Letter from TUBS to The Ink Babes

 
 
TUBS
666 Wolf Wind Way
Vampireville, Otherworld
 
 
 
 
 
Dear Ink Babes,               
 
Please be advised that I represent The Union of Beings Supernatural, otherwise known in our realm as TUBS. We wish to advise you that although we don’t mind you writing about us, we would like to make the following demands since you are including many of us in your stories and works of writing. Specific requests are detailed below from our prestigious members, and union heads.
 

1.       The Devil would like a soul mate in exchange for all the stories written about him, he never receives any compensation,  and it’s  long overdue.  

He saw Tammy’s picture, and said he would ensure she enjoys hot temperatures and a comfortable leadership position as his wife. He’s already drafted a contract for her soul and said to tell her to bring coins for the ferryman.

 

2.       Dracula speaks for all vampires and he is asking for access to a blood bank. Seems he’s asked all vampires to stay low-key these days, especially the sparkly ones. A blood bank would alleviate those mysterious ‘drained of blood’ deaths the cops have to keep finding new excuses for. If a blood bank is not something you can provide, he is willing to accept Pat into his seethe. He promises to grant her immortality and many years filled with an exciting nightlife.

 

3.       Lycaon, head of the werewolf line, would like a mate since he lost his in a rather gruesome battle. After seeing Lisa’s picture on Bleeding Ink, he wants her to become his wolf-mate for life.

Of course she would have to become a werewolf. He promises plenty of red meat, lots of exercise, and nights of baying under a romantic full moon with him.

 

4.       Our witch coven has cast a love spell on you babes. They love the dark images and posts you’ve created, and are thrilled you’ve given them the credit they deserve for so many wicked little stories. They’ve decided that romantic unions with heads of the union would be perfect and they’re even willing to become your wedding planners.

Gruesomely yours,
Frankenstein, CEO/TUBS
 
 

We at Bleeding Ink love a little humour in our lives. We love the dark, the twisted, the occult, supernatural, haunting, and any story that gives the reader something to think about long after he or she has read it. If you have a dark tale to tell, send it to us. We’d love to read them, and possibly include them in our anthology.

Our deadline is March 31, 2012, so submit your polished work to us.

 

Ever Yours,

The Ink Babes  

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6 Comments

  1. I can’t decide who I’m more jealous of. I’ll trade places with any of you if you’re unavailable.

    Reply
  2. Noted. 😉

    Reply
  3. omigod, the Devil? I’m so on it. Wait till he meets my lawyer, she’s gonna give him hell to pay. 😉

    Reply
    • Errrmmm, doesn’t he already own your lawyer or is she on a time share between Dracula and Lucifer? (After all they’re bloodsucking soulless and no I’m not talking about D and L here.)

      Anyway, where’s the options for us guys? Surely there has to be some supernatural ladies out there to tempt us?

      Reply
      • lol, you’ll always be an honourary babe here G. hehe, we’ll hook you up good and proper. But uh, careful what you wish for. 😉

  4. lisaforget

     /  March 10, 2012

    I’m on it Gareth. I’ll report back next week on the sitch!

    Very good of you to share the letter with our Bleeding Ink friends, Pat, everyone needs to know at what lengths we InkBabes will go to ensure the success of the anthology!

    Looking forward to reading the latest submissions. I might invite Lyacon to join me. I hear he just loves a deliciously dark tale…

    Reply

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