Those Poor Bloody Babes

So the other day I’m reading through a pile of submissions to Bleeding Ink Anthology (yes I actually print them off to read them), anyways I pick up this one particular story and get this nasty paper cut from it. Like, really bad. So immediately I look around for sparkling vampires, cause ya now, you can’t be too sure in my line of work, anyways, no such luck.

So I grab a Band-aid and find myself thinking Wow this must be a really AWESOME story, it made me bleed! I lcheck the title and it’s called One Babe At A Time, and the author? Yours truly. ME. Um ya, except for one little problem, I didn’t write it.

Naturally I’m curious so I carry it with me down to the basement, curl up under the sofa light, and begin to read;

Once upon a time there were three bloody babes…

Well, it was a long story, I’ll sum up; A macabre tale describing how I was going to kill off my two fellow Ink Babes in a big bloody mess during which I did A LOT of evil cackling until they were dead dead dead. Good times. Well at least until the next day when I apparently died of a paper cut I received whilst reading their obits in the local news rag.

At the time I thought it all very ironic but now that I’m here writing this letter from the ‘other’ side, I’m rather less than amused. I’m sure you can imagine why. I’m also sure you’re wondering why I’m telling you all this and where you fit in?

Well you see it’s like this, I stumbled across another story shortly before my untimely death and um, apparently it was written by yourselves. It went something like this;

Once upon a time there were a bunch of bloody blog readers…

The clock is ticking people and time is running out, closing date for the anthology is March 31st!!! Be sure to get any outstanding submissions in to us pronto!

Ever yours,

The Ink Babes

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  1. LOL, sorry to hear about the Paper Cut, they can be real so and so’s. If it helps, I tend to find cuts either when I have a bath or I have a quick itch, only to discover that the kitty noctural activity used me for either a bouncy castle (yep to get into the window) or as a Nascar track.

    Apparently I sleep through it only to wake when a mouse farts in another room. I’m also apparently well trained as the kitties will come up and Maow, get into their favourite position and then receive all the tickles they want. I have absolutely no memory of this but my other half finds it all very funny.

    Anyway, long story short have fun with those submissions and I’ll have a think to see if I have something that will suit.

  2. My wife edited a poetry zine for several years and can sympathize on all counts. Best of luck and hope there are no more paper cuts!

  3. hehe awesome 🙂 have fun reading all your submissions!

  4. lmao G!!! holy you make me laugh. You need to do standup! Love to see you submit something that shoes your warped funny bone, AWESOME. 🙂

  5. Tick, tick, tick writers…
    You crack me up Tammy! Looking forward to drinking with you…oops I mean, discussing the submissions with you this weekend in TO!!!


  6. Paper cut. There are two options that usually work:

    1. Go to A&E.
    2. Seal it with Superglue – seriously, they use it in hospitals.

    I hope your cut doesn’t turn gangrenous, and the digit fall off… Get well soon.

    • Thank you for your concern TJ, I’m sure I’ll live. Even when I’m dead. 😉 mwhuaa haahaaa

  7. Diane Girard

     /  March 4, 2012

    Once upon a nightmare, I found blood on my night wear.

    snick snick snick.



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